you might be a jaded raver if...

dirrrteeee · Post by **dirrrteeee** » Dec 4 2003 12:56 pm

i made everything i am guilty of bold

-You snicker when you hear someone say "PLUR".
-You finally realized that phat pants are heavy and unpractical.
-You refrain from dancing unless the circle is of rather large dimensions.
-When you do dance, you "battle".
-You learn to spin, and therefore have graduated to the "superior rave status".
-You find out just how crooked promoters really are.
-You hate massives.
-You blame candy kids for everything retarded in the scene.
-You say "the scene" a lot.
-You find out how much better european electronic music really is.
-You find out that glow sticks were cool TEN years ago in the UK.
-You have pretended to be rolling at a party just to get a quick laugh out of your friends.
-When you ARE on E, you do your best to act normal.
-You realize how cool Drum n' Bass is.
-You realize how lame progressive trance is.
-You find out that American DJ's are completely overrated.
-You have close friends who don't give a fuck about raving.
-You think that maybe YOU don't really give a fuck either.
-The smell of Vicks makes you physically sick.
-You can't help but laugh when someone tries to give you a "glow stick show".
-You learn to break.
-If you want to actually "roll," you have to eat about four pills at once.
-You can get those four pills for the same price that everyone else pays for one.
-You drink beer at after parties.
-You quit collecting fliers.
-You have unsubscribed from your rave mailing list, because "none of those fucking little kids understand a thing about raving, dammit!"
-You can't remember the last time you went to a party and didn't think it sucked
-You can't remember much in general.
-You realize that ravers aren't nearly as genuine as the hippies
-You wouldn't mind if that kid with the whistle accidentally swallowed it and died.
-You are actually called by your real name.
-You realize that the general public shoudln't be blamed for hating raves.
-You talk shit as much as possible.
-You value things in terms of vinyl, (ex: "that's an eight record pair of pants.")
-You despise Happy Hardcore.
-You despise candy.
-You have seen a thirteen year old "raver" on ecstasy and felt like leaving the party because of it.
-You know what a 303 is.
-You no longer feel the need to advertise your "rave-ness" to the world.
-You know that post-rave sex is aweful.
-You've punked kids who tried to get in a circle that was outta their league.
-You can determine where a raver is from just by the way they dance.
-You know that LA ravers can't dance worth a shit.
-You find out that underground parties still happen quite frequently, despite what 98% of the raving populous thinks.
-You party sober and now understand how stupid you looked when you didn't.
-You know who produced your favorite tracks, not just which DJ bought it and put it on a mix CD.
-Your parents gave up on you becoming normal a long, long time ago.
-You know why GHB and special K are for idiots.
-You understand electro and minimal techno now.
-You could out-dance any boy band, any day, while smoking a cigarette.
-You begin to notice how often big DJ's blow mixes.
-You think sweaty guys who run around the party shirtless should get thrown out.
-You act like a punk-ass bitch to security, police, and any other authority.
-You purposely wear way too much clothing to parties, because you know that dancing in a turtleneck sweater looks fucking ill.
-You say "ill" a lot.
-You have replaced Caffiene, JNCO, and Adidas with Technic, Vestax, and JBL.
-You know that raving is all about the music, but ravers are not.
-You can actually dance to jungle.
-You see guys from your high school football team at a party.
-You know raving is mainstream as fuck.
-The bigger the flier, the less you want to go to the party.
-You can re-tell the story of how raving came to America quite accurately.
-You hate Anthem tracks.
-Your sleeping, and eating habits are completely fucked up.
-You're not racist, but you just have to wonder where the hell all those Asian kids are coming from.
-You sit around with friends and tell old "rave disaster" stories.
-You are amazed that you are somehow still alive

Preppy Raver · Post by **Preppy Raver** » Dec 4 2003 01:12 pm

You purposely wear way too much clothing to parties, because you know that dancing in a turtleneck sweater looks fucking ill.

o.k. if i were to put bold on everyone that applies to me....it would be the whole fricken post....i love it heather....aww sitting on my porch telling old raver stories, those were the days!

dirrrteeee · Post by **dirrrteeee** » Dec 4 2003 01:18 pm

let me add

-When you hear someone clapping along to the music you want to clap your hand to the back of their head.

Preppy Raver · Post by **Preppy Raver** » Dec 4 2003 01:51 pm

o0okrakhedo0o wrote:let me add

-When you hear someone clapping along to the music you want to clap your hand to the back of their head.

hey now i do that all the time!

e.coli · Post by **e.coli** » Dec 4 2003 01:52 pm

me thinks me just learned a bit about meself with that list.. lol

nobuhiro_223 · Post by **nobuhiro_223** » Dec 4 2003 02:01 pm

wow so right (but i love my fat pants still)

Lori · Post by **Lori** » Dec 4 2003 02:21 pm

A few of my own...

You remember that when coming home from a rave, you definitely want to shower before hitting the sheets...or you'll be washing them in the morning.

If you are a girl raver and wearing a tank top, you know to keep swiping that streak of "whatever" from between the boobs.

You deliberately swipe the glo stix from that floppy idiot who just flung them off the strings while trying to dance with them and jam them in the toilet to entertain the ones who ate too many beans...might as well watch a pretty light show after flushing their money away.

allmightyone420 · Post by **allmightyone420** » Dec 4 2003 03:09 pm

I personally think I have lived the first twenty...especially the one about having friends that don't give a Phuck. I a lot of times wonder if I am the only person who listens to electronic music when around my "We're now in our Mid 20's and listen to NPR becasue we are too boring to be cool" friends.

Way too funny and true!!!!!

TrixR4Me · Post by **TrixR4Me** » Dec 4 2003 03:41 pm

Yes I agree with everything up there except I still like my Phat pants every now and then

BUt they aren't the heavy ones

dirrrteeee · Post by **dirrrteeee** » Dec 4 2003 04:17 pm

every one knows i still rock em phat, maybe friday you'll see some big old heavy ass ones, or maybe some new not so heavy big ass pants with a good strong belt

Preppy Raver · Post by **Preppy Raver** » Dec 4 2003 04:54 pm

i rock my phat pants as much as possible....

and i rock em with my turtle necks!!!

allmightyone420 · Post by **allmightyone420** » Dec 4 2003 07:02 pm

I am actually wearing my phat pants at work today....gotta love it!!!

Dawn · Post by **Dawn** » Dec 4 2003 10:34 pm

**Sighs**

Do I have phat pants?

dirrrteeee · Post by **dirrrteeee** » Dec 5 2003 09:52 am

if you don't i am sure i have a pair you can borrow

ryan · Post by **ryan** » Dec 5 2003 10:40 am

the interesting thing is that this list is over five years old......and what's funny and disturbing at the same time is the fact that i agreed with most of the points on it then........

ryan